The Ballon d'Or Shortlist, in a skit

 The Ballon d'Or shortlist came out today. Twenty-three players, 22 of which will all lose to Messi.

I thought this video from FIFA was pretty crap and a skit with all their names would be much cooler. Welp, here goes...

"Ugh, Andres, did you hear what happened to Ibra?", said Xavi.

"Oh, what kinda messi is he in now?"

"Got thrown in the lewandowski again for robben some silva-haired lady's persie."

"Jesus Cristiano! That guy is such a hazard.'

"You know we gotta go bale him out, right?

"¡Get the falcaoutta here!"

"Come on, we suarez we would."

"I don't know man, I gotta muller over. What if he goes on the lahm? He's not exactly the bastian of obedience."

"But he promised he wouldn't mesut up again."

"OK, but I'll be franck, this is last time. And I don't wanna hang out with him aneymar."

"That's fine. We can find some neuer friends. "

"Yaya! Like Edinson, he's cute."

"Andrea! Behave.."

"Ugh, you know I hate when you call me that.."